What’s the Point?

Home alone, I turned off Netflix and took a look around my house. Dirty dishes sat on the kitchen counter and my living room needed to be dusted and vacuumed. “I can do it tomorrow,” I thought. 

As I looked at my dishes again, I wondered, “what’s happened to me?” Only over the last year or so have I developed the skills of procrastination. Most of my life I have been a dedicated, hard worker in EVERYTHING. My perfectionist-accomplishment-driven-self was always bound and determined to do well. I’ve wondered how I so defeatedly lost my will power. Then a question I play in my head far to often came to mind, “What’s the point?” 

What is the point in doing dishes today if I could do them tomorrow? What is the point in being creative now when I could later? What is the point in stepping out in faith today when that discomfort could be avoided until someday? 

I regretfully came to the conclusion that, “What’s the point?” dictated many moments in my life. For the past six months, God has been asking me to be creative. As a little girl, I won art contests, wrote short stories, and even had a poem published in a humble children’s poetry book.

Looking over my past, I realized I became less and less creative the older I got. I was driven academically but only had small pockets of creativity when I hit certain breaking points in my life. These moments of creativity usually followed or were in the midst of stressful or uncertain seasons.

Thinking back to these times, I saw sporadic voice lessons and piano lessons and a random wheel pottery class and thought of how much I enjoyed those things and wondered why none of them stuck. Then, “what’s the point?” popped into my head again. I had decided, if I could not do any of those things professionally, they were a waste of my time, energy, and also, money. I needed to spend more time and energy on things that would actually invest in my future. 

While evaluating your life and options are important, I had let the words “What’s the point” kill my dreams, my creativity, my ability to trust and have faith in God, and eventually kill my productivity and motivation. 

“What’s the point?” demands safety, answers, and guaranteed success. Although, as believers we “live by faith and not by sight” (2 Corinthians 5:7 NIV). 

Considering this, I started writing down all the creative things I would do if “What’s the point?” wasn’t a variable in my life. And the crazy thing is, most of these were not even impossible or unreachable to me TODAY. I wondered not only what tomorrow but what today could look like, if I lived like I had nothing to lose. 

I began to pray God would help me live like I have nothing to lose. It occurred to me being obedient to God may cost me. It may cost me my time, energy, money, and reputation, all of which I hold very dear (see Philippians 3:7). 

And then I realized, if God is my Everything (savior, provider, comforter, friend, father, redeemer, counselor, and refuge) then I really have nothing to lose, when being obedient to him.

Maybe you’re like me, and in the back of your mind, you knew all of this to be true. So what is stopping you? As I wrote earlier, I originally thought it was will power, but will power can only sustain you for so long.

I had a conversation not that long ago with a family member. It was regarding a totally different situation but they brought to my attention that it is not will power that helps us overcome and accomplish difficult things in our life, but surrender to God. 

It was not until I was surveying my messy house, and also unproductive life, that it finally came back to me. The only thing that can sustain me is daily surrender to God. Surrender to God and “what’s the point” cannot co-exist. Surrendering lays down all rights and all theories of any possible outcomes and leaves them in God’s hands. Surrender allows us to truly acknowledge God as our Everything and positions us do what he’s called us to do. Even if that means losing somethings in the process. (In my case, time, energy, money, and reputation.)

Don’t let “what’s the point”, self-doubt, and worry slow your journey towards your dreams and goals. Whether it’s taking a great leap of faith or something as simple as doing your dishes, surrender it to God.