The other morning, I sat down to have my Jesus time. I was feeling a little overwhelmed with some quotes we’d received from some repairmen and the budget I had done the afternoon before.
Our new house is awesome but needs work, we have debt we want paid off, and the list of things we “need” or “will need” over time seems endless. Not to mention, I’m not working, aka not making money, and feeling like this season in my life is getting a little ridiculous. As I was about to spill all of this into my prayer journal, I paused for a moment and realized how silly I (STILL) am. If my steps were ordered by the Lord (Proverbs 16:9) and I have sought after Him in the last 18 months, clearly this season and its expenses are not a surprise to God. After all, His Ways and Thoughts are higher than mine (Isaiah 55:9.)
Instead I prayed He would speak to me and help me come to Him without fear or an agenda. I prayed He would help me have an open mind and open heart.
Abide is a weird word for me. I don’t use it often and as I wrote it out in my journal, I was surprised to see it there. My vocabulary is very limited. For instance, there have been times my husband and I have gotten into a heated discussion and my lack of face filter let him know that I wasn’t sure where the conversation was headed because I didn’t know the meaning to the last word he said. Yikes!
Anywho. As I thought about the word abide, I thought of the verse about abiding in Christ and looked up John 15:5-8 NKJV.
“I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples.”
WOW. During this season, I have worried about my purpose, do I have anything or enough to show for it? (Still trying to justify my actions if not to others, at least to myself). But if I abide in Him and He in me, I will bear much fruit. But without God, I CAN DO NOTHING. I can make all the “right” decisions, go back to a stable 9-5 job and paycheck, but without God it will amount to NOTHING. However, if I abide in Him and His words abide in me, I will ask what I desire and it shall be done for me.
Not only does scripture back this up, but so have the last 11 months of my life. I quit my safe, full-time job and less than a year later we bought our first house. What?!
So, am I saying we should all quit our jobs? No. Ha, sorry. But what are you facing? Has God put something on your heart that you feel unqualified for or you just don’t know where to start? Are you overwhelmed by a situation? I encourage you to immerse yourself in Jesus and His Word. Become so connected to Him as branches are to the vine and watch your life bear much fruit!