I gave up social media for two weeks during COVID-19. Does that make me a hero? Yes. TOTALLY KIDDING. But I feel like people in my generation get a bad wrap for being “addicted” to our technology. As if every generation before us were more present in their daily lives and didn’t have any distraction? I honestly believed this lie and would talk down to myself when I would catch myself scrolling through my phone.
I would think, “This is stupid,” or “How lame are you for wasting so much time on social media?!” I didn’t feel like I fell into the group of people who were so self absorbed and obsessed with the amount of likes, comments, and followers they had, so why was I on my phone all the time? This is what I learned.
- I’m lonely. There’s a root cause for every addiction. Especially after becoming a mom, I found myself with little to no adult interaction most days. I was able to make some changes but thanks to coronavirus, I am back to little to no in person interaction. Scrolling through social media gave me some sense of “community” even though it left me feeling depleted when I was done. Giving up social media gave me the opportunity to call my addiction for what it really is and find healthy ways to deal with my loneliness.
- I’m anxious. Am I losing sleep over coronavirus? Not really. But the CONSTANT updates on cases and deaths and the effects this is having on our cities, states, and nation is a lot to process. I felt so silly admitting to a friend that I felt unsettled, anxious, and discontent. She lovingly pointed out to me that none of us have been through this before and it’s okay to have a reaction to it. Making myself put down my phone and not see constant press conferences, personal opinions, and graphs about flattening the curve, forced me to address MY feelings about what is going on in the world and how it is affecting my daily life.
- I’m creative. If I ever found some time to myself and decided I wasn’t going to clean or fold laundry, I would think, “could I really accomplish that much in 15 or 30 minutes?” So, instead of picking up a book, sketching out a drawing, or picking up a musical instrument, I would decide I was tired and would scroll through my phone. Addressing my feelings and realizing I needed to process them without numbing out by scrolling through my phone, made me take time to do things “I never have time to do”. I was able to cope and be creative. I played little tunes on my piano and guitar, wrote/sketched out my favorite lyrics and words of affirmation and placed them throughout the house.
- I’m able to rest. There’s probably a diagnosis out there to describe what goes on in my brain, but for now, we’re just going to call it unique. My unique brain was thinking about what kind of backsplash we could put in our kitchen since we will be painting it soon and hopefully someday painting the cabinets as well. But as I was scrolling through pinterest, I realized the only thing that didn’t make me feel overwhelmed was white subway tile. Did this mean I can’t handle the character in other backsplashes? No. It meant I needed to put down my phone and work on something else. Usually, I struggled to pinpoint anxiety when scrolling through Instagram or Facebook. Several times, I caught myself wanting to praise, complain, or encourage on social media and then remembered, “oh, I can’t.” And believe it or not, I didn’t feel sad about it. I more so felt relieved. I felt more present and more able to slow down my brain and just be. I even misplaced my phone more than usual and was able to be at rest.
- I still found community and relationship. While social distancing makes socializing look different, I was still able to talk with family and friends. When I would think of someone, I genuinely didn’t “know” how they were doing that week because I hadn’t seen them post anything. So I was able to reach out and personally ask them. I’m thankful for the ability to call, Zoom, text, Facetime, and even write a little snail mail.
So, I’m sharing this blog on social media. Do I think social media is terrible and I will delete it forever? Absolutely not. I’m a huge supporter of everything in moderation. But I am surprised with what I learned about myself and hope to use what I learned to be a better me during these uncertain times.
How are you feeling during all of this? What changes have you made or can you make to reduce stress and increase self care during these uncertain times? How can I be praying for you? I’m cheering for you! Until next time.